New Year's at Relena's
by T.D. Winner
Summary: Here it is at last. The final episode! Rated PG for mild language.


**New Year's at Relena's**

By T.D. Winner

Disclaimer: Once again, I do not own Gundam Wing. It is still the property of Sunrise and Sotsu Agency

P.S. Sorry it took so long to finish. I got caught up in schoolwork.

Feb. 7, 2002

PART I: THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS 

            "Ooh…" Hilde groaned as she sat up and rubbed her stomach, "Hey, Duo…huh??? Where are you???" she got out of bed and looked around the room. Duo was nowhere in sight. She grabbed her slippers and robe and walked downstairs.

            "Heero! (gasp!) Please! Not so tight! (gack!) You're choking me!!!" Relena gasped as Heero clutched her in his sleep.

            Heero stirred a bit, "Mmmmnnn nnnghh….hn? Oh." He let go of Relena, who gasped in air rapidly, "Sorry." He muttered. Heero got out of bed, put on his tank top and went downstairs.

            Catherine fell out of bed, "Whoa!!! (wump!) Ow…hm? Trowa?" She looked around. Trowa was not in their room, "He must be having breakfast." Catherine thought, "I'll go join him." She went downstairs.

            "So…I guess we're even now." Sally said as she got off the floor.

            Wufei crossed his arms, "Bah! That's for the first time you knocked me off!"

            Sally stood up and put her hands on her hips, "Well _sorry!"_

            Wufei got out of bed, "I'm going to get breakfast." He declared as he walked to the door.

            Dorothy opened her eyes and found herself squeezing a pillow, "Oh? Where has Quatre run off to?" she thought as she got out of bed. Quatre's spot was empty, "Ooh! He must be downstairs having breakfast! I'll surprise him! Tee hee!" she skipped to the dresser to grab something to change into.

            "Zechs." Noin gently shook a still sleeping Milliardo, "Zechs, wake up! It's almost eight thirty!"

            Milliardo rolled over and muttered something.

            Noin decided to leave him alone and got out of bed.

            "Ha! I beat you all!" Duo declared as he held up his Deathscythe Hell's beam scythe.

            "No you don't!" Quatre said as he fixed the shield on his Sandrock, "Trowa and I snuck up on you and blew you up!"

            "Bah!" Wufei snorted as he put one of the dragon fangs back into position, "You cannot gang up on an opponent! Besides, I already blew you up!"

            "With what???" Quatre cried, "A dragon fang???"

            Wufei nodded, "Yep, good old dragon fang."

            "How come none of us noticed this then?" Quatre said.

            Wufei crossed his arms, "You were too busy fighting Maxwell."

            "But you guys couldn't see me!" Duo protested, "I was in stealth mode!!!"

Trowa just sat there, with his Heavy Arms figure in his hand.

            Sally suddenly called out, "Hey guys! Stop playing with your action figures and come eat breakfast!"

            "Yes, mother," Duo muttered as they walked over to the dining hall.

            "No toys at the table!" Hilde said sternly.

            "Hey! These aren't toys!" Duo protested, "They're Deluxe Action Figures!!!"

            Trowa nodded.

            Hilde sighed, "Fine, but don't make a mess or anything!"

            Duo nodded happily, "Yes, mother!"

            Quatre spoke up, "Excuse me, Hilde? Um, aren't action figures a kind of toy?"

            "Shut up!!!" Duo cried.

            Hilde paused a moment before smacking herself on the head, "Oh, duh!!! Put 'em back in the living room, guys."

            Trowa shrugged and walked back to the living room. Quatre followed.

            Duo shrugged and walked off to find his breakfast.

            "Hey Sally, are you going to make more of that army feed stuff?" Hilde asked as she walked up to Sally, who was standing by the counter.

            Sally shook her head, "Maybe later. Right now, I'm having some toast." She stared at the toaster, "besides, it's your turn to cook."

            Hilde's eyes widened, "What???"

            "Hello!" Catherine said cheerily as she walked into the kitchen.

            Hilde grabbed Catherine, "Cathy!!! Whose turn is it to cook???"

            Catherine blinked, "Uh…I think it's your turn, why?"

            "AAAAAGHHH!!!" Hilde cried as she clutched her head, "I'm a bad cook! Ask Duo!"

            Suddenly they heard Duo cry out, "Finally!!! After days of waiting! My patience has paid off!!! Behold!!!" The ladies walked out of the kitchen to find Duo standing on a chair, holding up a donut, "A jelly-filled donut!!!"

            "Yay." Trowa said as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

            "Trowa!!!" Catherine cried in a panic, "How many cups of coffee have you had so far???"

            Trowa stared at her, "This is my first cup."

            "Lemme see!" Catherine said as she ran over to Trowa, "Open your mouth!!!"

            Trowa opened his mouth.

            Catherine looked inside his mouth, "Hmmm…no coffee stains or anything…ok, fine. Drink your coffee. But don't drink more than six!!!"

            Trowa nodded.

            After breakfast, the four pilots returned to playing with their action figures, while the ladies settled down for a nice long chat. Only Heero and Milliardo were shining their prized possessions. 

            "Hey, Zechs," Heero suddenly spoke up.

            Milliardo continued shining his helmet, "Yeah, what?"

            Heero continued, "I was thinking…don't you wish you had a piece of your Gundam to shine?"

            Milliardo paused, "Hm…I don't need one."

            Heero grunted.

            "Besides, I have my helmet to shine." Milliardo held up his helmet to inspect it.

            The rest of the day was spent doing whatever they were doing that morning. That evening, dinner was casual and afterwards, people broke off into little groups doing misc. things. 

            "I still say I should have won." Duo said to Quatre as they walked to the library.

            "But Trowa and I blew you up!" Quatre said.

            "Are you guys talking about the first battle or what?" Wufei suddenly said as he caught up with them.

            "Uh…I think it was the twenty-second." Duo said after a slight pause.

            "Ha! I defeated all of you there!" Wufei said proudly.

            "Nu-uhhh!!!" Duo protested, "You had Trowa and Quatre shooting at you too!"

            "So?" Wufei shot back, "At least they concentrated on you! You died within the first few minutes!"

            "Yeah," Duo muttered, "Then you died."

            "Ah, but that's what you think!" Wufei said smugly, "I managed to disabled Quatre just before I was…defeated!"

            "No you didn't!" Quatre cried out, "You went 'boom'! There was nothing left of you to blow up the two of us!"

            Wufei sighed, "This is truly unjust! Next time, I think we should make Heero play!"

            "Oh sure! Let Heero play!" Duo said unhappily, "He'll just vaporize us one by one with that big gun of his!"

            "Actually it's two guns," Quatre corrected.  
            "Yeah, whatever, my mistake." Duo grumbled as he opened the door to the library.

            The three boys walked over to one of the massive bookshelves and began searching for a book. After several minutes, Quatre cried out, "Hey! I found it!" He held up a large dictionary.

            "Good. Look up the word!" Wufei said.

            "Ok," Quatre began flipping through the pages, "Hm…no, that's not it…hm? Hey Duo! Is this it?" He held up the dictionary for Duo to see.

            "Yep! That's it!" Duo said triumphantly.

            "But I still don't see what that has to do with Hilde!" Quatre said in confusion.

            Duo rubbed the back of his head, "Uh…you see, there was this time she misspelled her name and it came out as 'Hirde'. Sooooo…"

            "But that's not how 'Hirde' was spelled in the dictionary!" Quatre pointed out, "It's Hurdy-Gurdy!"

            Duo paused, "Oooohhh…hee hee hee!" He ran out of the library.

            Quatre sweat-dropped, "Oh dear…"

            "Bah! He's gonna get in trouble for whatever he's gonna do." Wufei said.

            "Let's go see." Quatre said as he stood up.

            "Hm, you are right. This should be funny." Wufei said as he followed Quatre. They got there just in time to see Duo sit down next to Hilde.

            Duo flung an arm around her shoulder, "What's up, Hirdy-Gurdy?"

            Hilde whirled around, "What did you just call me???" She didn't seem too happy about the name.

            Duo blinked, "Uh…I said uh…."

            Hilde interrupted, "Do not EVER call me that again!" She got up and stalked off to where Sally and Noin were conversing.

            "Hm, guess she doesn't like that." Duo thought as he got up to find something to drink.

            "Duo," Quatre said as he caught up to Duo, "That was mean."

            Duo looked at Quatre, "Ya think so?"

            Quatre nodded, "Yes. By the way she acted, I'd say she would have killed you if um…if you weren't you." He paused to think whether or not his statement came out right or not.

            "Bah! Such weak behavior!" Wufei said as he crossed his arms, "Mocking women is such a…a…pitiful pastime!"

            "Uh…ok, sure…" Duo said as he refilled his drink.

            The rest of the evening was rather uneventful. The next two days were the same: the ladies chatted all day, Duo, Quatre, Trowa and Wufei played with their action figures and Heero and Milliardo spent the days shining or admiring their prized possessions.

PART II: TWO DAYS BEFORE NEW YEARS' EVE 

            By this time, Hilde had forgiven Duo. Everyone was happy, sort of. Relena started whining about how her brother wasn't doing his share of the household chores. She also began trying very hard to get Heero away from shining his little chunk of Gundanium. 

            "Heero, why don't we go out onto the balcony?" Relena suggested as she watched Heero and Milliardo shine their prized possessions.

            "Can't," Heero replied, "It's…too cold."

            "The kid's right," Milliardo added as he held up his helmet to inspect it.

            Suddenly Noin walked in the room, "Zechs, why don't you take a break and spend some time with me?"

            Milliardo paused a bit before setting down his helmet on the felt cloth, "Yes, dear." He took off his gloves and laid them next to his helmet and walked out the room.

            Relena leaned towards Heero, "Heero, why don't we go and get some refreshments?"

            Heero looked up from his polishing, "Hnnn…fine." He stood up, placed his chunk of Gundanium on the table on top of his cloth and walked out the room.

            Relena sweat-dropped as she followed him.

            After Heero drank his tea, he decided to see what the other pilots were doing. He found them all crowded around a table with Duo smacking the red, green, blue, or yellow light on a black disk.

            "What's that?" Heero asked as he walked up to the group.

            "It's called-" Duo started to answer. Unfortunately, this ruined his concentration and he lost, "CRAP!"

            "Crap?" Heero repeated.

            "No, no, no!" Quatre responded, "Its' called Simon. The lights um…light up and what ever light lights up, you have to press!" He picked up the Simon disk thing, "Here! You try it!"

            "Mission accepted." Heero said as he sat down. The red light flashed. Heero pressed it. The red light flashed again, followed by a yellow and green flash. Heero pressed all three buttons. Soon the pace quickened. Remarkably, Heero managed to keep up with the increasing pace. Soon his hands were flying all over the Simon disk. But, like so many before him, he eventually lost. 

            "Game over." The game said.

            Heero stared in disbelief as the game automatically shut off, "I…I failed…I TOTALLY FAILED!!!" He reached down to grab his self-destruct button, only he was wearing his spandex shorts, which meant he had no pockets. He glared at the Simon game.

            "No you didn't!" Quatre said in an attempt to comfort Heero, "You did better than any of us!"

            "Yeah," Duo smirked, "Quatre went insane when he lost during level ten."

            Quatre blushed, "Um, yeah…"

            "Bah! That game was rigged!" Wufei said, "There is no way you can beat that…flashing dish!"

            Relena walked in, "Hello everyone! Ooh! I see you've found Milliardo's annoying toy."

            "Milliardo's???" The pilots' eyes widened.

            Relena nodded, "Yes, he's had that for quite a while now. He still plays it from time to time." She shrugged, "He claims it keeps his reflexes sharp."

            The pilots looked at each other and sweat-dropped.

            "Oh! I almost forgot!" Relena smiled as she held out Heero's chunk of Gundanium, "Here you go!"

            Heero nodded and took the piece back.

            Suddenly, all five pilots looked at the piece of Gundanium and then at the Simon game, "Oooh!!!" they said in unison. Apparently, the same silly thought had crossed their minds. However, when they realized that the Zero System no longer existed, their faces fell, "Awww…"

            Relena, who was oblivious to their thoughts, just saw them go 'ooh!' one second and 'aww…' another, thought they were just being boys. She sweat-dropped and left the room.

            They spent the rest of the afternoon trying to beat Simon. Of course, they always failed.

            By the time dinner came around, their hands were pretty sore.

            "Ow." Duo grimaced as he ran his hand under some running water.

            "Maybe it wasn't a good idea to have each person press a button while the other person called out the color." Quatre sighed.

            "Bah! It was not my fault the game was rigged!" Wufei said indignantly.

            "I'm hungry." Trowa said as he walked out the bathroom.

            Like the past several dinners, it was a casual dinner and like the past several dinners, it was quite peaceful, until Milliardo brought up the subject about the events of the afternoon.

            "So," Milliardo said as he stirred his soup, "I heard you kids found my Simon game."

            The pilots stopped eating and glared at their plates, even Trowa, although it was rather hard to tell if he was actually glaring or not.

            Milliardo sweat-dropped, "Uh…let me guess, you pilots were-"

            "YES," Wufei interrupted, "WE WERE DEFEATED BY…BY A MACHINE! A CHILD'S PLAYTHING, NONETHELESS, BUT STILL, IT WAS A MACHINE!!!"

            This caught Dorothy's attention, "Ooh!" she thought, "the Gundam pilots can't seem to beat a child's game! How interesting! Tee hee!" she giggled in her mind.

"Yeah!" Duo added, "We've never really lost to mobile dolls, so how is it that we're losing to a simple kids game???"

            Trowa nodded.

            "IT'S RIGGED, I SAY!" Wufei declared.

            Heero continued glaring at his plate.

            Relena looked over at Heero, "Heero? Are you upset too?"

            Heero continued to glare at his plate, "Hnnn…" he growled.

            Relena sweat-dropped.

            Hilde put down her fork, "You guys, really!"

            "Yeah, you guys!" Sally joined in, "Aren't you five just a little too old to be getting mad at a simple game?"

            There was a brief pause before Quatre answered, "No."  
            Noin sighed, "Zechs, maybe you should put it away so it won't cause anymore problems."

            Milliardo nodded.

            "Wait!" Quatre spoke up, "We'd like to beat it first before you do!"

            Milliardo smirked, "Hm, there's no way to beat it. It just get faster and faster until your fingers get numb." 

            Quatre sighed, "Oh dear…"            

            "If I had Zero, I would have defeated it." Heero growled.

            Milliardo gave a small, sly grin.

            "Oh stop it! Finish your dinner!" Noin said to everyone.

            After dinner, everyone sort of broke off into groups again.

            "Ok guys, here's a plan!" Quatre said they slowly walked towards the Simon game.

            "Hi guys!" Catherine smiled as she walked in, "Mind if I try?"

            The pilots shook their heads and stood back as they watched Catherine try to play. Like most people, she got passed the first few levels. However, around level six, she began to slow down as the lights flashed faster and faster until finally, she grabbed the game and screamed, "STOP!!! I GIVE UP!!!" She handed the game to Trowa and ran out the room. The pilots sweat-dropped.

            "Oh my," Quatre said worriedly, "I hope she's ok."

            Trowa nodded and put the game back on the table.

            Sally and the other ladies were busy chatting when Catherine ran into the room, face all red.

            "Whoa!" Sally exclaimed as she set down her cup, "What happened to you???"

            Catherine sat down heavily and buried her face in her arms.

            "Oh! You must have done something embarrassing!" Hilde said.

            Catherine shook her head.

            "Did you and your brother fight?" Relena asked.

            Again, Catherine shook her head.

            Noin sweat-dropped, "Let me guess…it was the game."

            Catherine nodded.

            Noin sighed and stood up, "ZECHS!!!" she yelled. The ladies heard a crash, some stumbling, some inappropriate word, and the sound of running.

            Milliardo ran into the room, clutching his helmet, panting, "What, Noin??? Did that kid try to kill Relena—"

            "His name is Heero!" Relena said indignantly.

            Milliardo ignored her, "Did you lose something??? WELL???"

            Noin put her hands on her hips, "Zechs, put away your Simon game. Just look what it did to poor Catherine!" She gestured to Catherine, who still had her face buried in her arms.

            Milliardo sweat-dropped, "Uh…alright…" He slowly walked out of the room, still holding the helmet. When he reached the library, things were already chaotic.

            "INJUSTCE, I SAY!!!" Wufei cried as he raised a fist, "THERE IS NO WAY TO BEAT THIS…THIS…CHILD'S GAME!!!"

            "BWAH HA HA HA!!!" Quatre cried out maniacally from a corner, "I'LL DESTROY YOU ALL!!!"

            "NOOOOOO!!! WHY WON'T YOU LOSE???" Duo shouted as he hopped up and down in frustration.

            Heero was looking something to self-destruct with. Eventually, he found a pen. Heero held the pen out and said, "Mission…failed." He pressed the pen top. When he heard the pen click, he sort of calmed down.

            Trowa, meanwhile, just stood there, staring, or glaring depending on your point of view, at the Simon game.

            Milliardo sweat-dropped and walked in, "Ok, kids, you obviously cannot handle such a simple game!" He reached over and grabbed the Simon game.

            "Oh yeah?" Duo challenged, "Why don't we see you try, then, huh, Helmet Man?"

            Milliardo was taken back a bit by this sudden remark. But he could not simply walk away from a challenge. He put on his helmet, "Fine. I'll accept your challenge." He sat down by a table and began playing. The pilots watched with interest as Milliardo began smacking the lights in the proper sequence. Soon things were speeding up and around level 30 he finally lost.

            "Ha," Milliardo said as he leaned back in his chair, "Try and beat that!"

            The five pilots stared dumbfounded.

            "Im…impossible!" Wufei stuttered.

            "Oh crap…" Duo stared.

Quatre's eyes widened, "I'm sorry for doubting your abilities, um…sir."

            "Good job." Trowa said.

            Heero growled.

            Milliardo stood up, grabbed his game and walked out.

            As soon as he left the room, Duo threw up his hands in surrender, "That's it! I'm going to bed!"

            After a brief pause, the pilots decided that going to bed wasn't such a bad idea, so they followed Duo.

PART III: THE DAY BEFORE NEW YEARS' EVE 

                        Dorothy awoke to find Quatre staring at the ceiling with bags under his eyes, "Quatre? Are you ok?" Dorothy whispered.

            "Must…beat…Simon…"Quatre answered weakly as he stared at the ceiling.

            Dorothy got out of bed, "Well, good luck. Tee hee!" That made Quatre jolt.

            "Waagh! Um…I uh…" Quatre blushed, "Um…good morning!"

            Meanwhile, Hilde was awakened by some laughter. When she looked beside her, she saw Duo holding a pillow, chuckling in his sleep.

            "Awwww…" Hilde sighed, "He's so cute when he does that…"

            Duo's eyes slowly opened, "Heh heh…Simon's been defeated…" he said sleepily.

            Hilde sweat-dropped, "What??? You mean that was the thing you were laughing about in your sleep???"

            Duo's eyes widened, "WHAT? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT IT WAS ALL JUST A DREAM???"

            Hilde nodded.

            Duo clutched his head in anguish, "NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

            About that same time, Wufei had just screamed the exact same thing.

            Sally bolted up out of bed, "WHAT? WHAT HAPPENED??? DID SOMETHING SCARE YOU???"

            Wufei glared at the edge of the bed, "No!"

            Sally straightened her shirt, "Then what was it? A monster?"

            Wufei continued to glare at the edge of the bed, "…nnn, sort of…"

            Sally continued, "Uh…was it…black with four lights?"

            Wufei turned red with rage/embarrassment, "YES! IT WAS THE SILLY SIMON GAME!!!"

            Sally sweat-dropped, "on failed…" over and over again. Obviously, neither one of them got much sleep that night because of Heero's Oye…come on, Wufei, let's go get breakfast…"

            Meanwhile, Relena stared at Heero, who was sitting up in bed, clicking a pen, repeating, "Mission failed…missi incessant clicking.

            "Heero," Relena said sleepily, "Why don't you stop playing with your pen and sleep."

            "No," Heero replied, "I can't rest until Simon is defeated…" he continued clicking the pen.

            "That does it!" Relena said as she got out of bed, "This has gone too far!" she stalked out of the room. Heero watched her leave and went back to clicking his pen.

            Relena banged on Milliardo's door, "Milliardo! Open up!" She heard a crash, a 'galump!', Milliardo swearing and Noin telling him to calm down.

            "What is it, Relena???" Milliardo glared as he opened the door. He was still wearing his nightshirt and boxers.

            Relena put her hands on her hips, "Come see what your silly game has done to my Heero!"

            Milliardo blinked, "Huh? Heero?" He followed Relena to her room where he saw Heero sitting up in bed clicking his pen while still saying, "Mission failed…"

            Milliardo sweat-dropped, "Uh…so?"

            "So nothing!" Relena cried in exasperation, "Just look at what it's done to poor Heero!"

            Milliardo looked slightly confused, "Uh…isn't he always like this?"

            "No, you insensitive dolt!" Relena pouted, "He has been like that all night and neither one of us has gotten any sleep!"

            Milliardo shrugged, "Not my problem. You're the one who wanted to bunk with him." He turned around and walked back to his room.

            "Milliardo!" Relena cried, "Come back here! Milliardo!!!"

            Milliardo ignored her and shut the door.

            "Zechs, that wasn't very nice." Noin said as she searched for a clean shirt.

            "But it's not my problem." Milliardo grumbled as he walked over to the sink.

            Noin sighed, "You two just can't seem to get along…"

            Meanwhile downstairs, everyone had gotten breakfast and was busy eating, at least some of them were.

            "Why?" Duo muttered as he mixed up his scrambled eggs with his fork, "Why the hell can't we beat Simon?"

            "Duo!" Quatre hissed, "Don't say that!"

            Duo looked over at him, "What? Do you really think we can beat Simon?"

            Quatre shook his head, "No, I just don't want to hear you say the um…'H' word."

            Duo eyes widened, "What??? That's crazy!!! I mean, you hear me rave about Deathscythe Hell and you don't seem to have a problem!"

            Quatre sweat-dropped, "Um, yeah, but…it's part of a name!"

            "So?" Duo shrugged, "I use the word for uh…emphasis."

            "Eat your breakfast, Duo! It's getting cold!" Hilde exclaimed.

            "Hm…need more coffee…" Trowa said to himself as he stood up.

            Catherine stood up and pointed to his chair, "No, Trowa! Sit down! You've already had enough coffee!"

            "Just one more cup," Trowa replied as he walked to the kitchen.

           "Trowa! No!" Catherine cried as she grabbed the cup from Trowa's hand, "Too much coffee is bad for you!"

           "Trowa! Why don't you try some tea?" Quatre suggested.

            Trowa looked at his cup, then at Quatre, then back at his cup, "Fine, I'll have some tea." Trowa walked over to Quatre, where he poured some tea for Trowa.

            "Here you go, Trowa!" Quatre smiled as he handed Trowa the teacup.

            "Thanks," Trowa said before he drank the whole content in one gulp.

            Quatre's eyes widened, "Um Trowa…you're not supposed to drink tea that way…"

            Trowa blinked, "I understand…can I have some more?"

            Quatre sweat-dropped and poured him another cup.

            After breakfast, Quatre, Duo, Trowa, and Wufei decided to take their minds off of Simon by going back to playing with their action figures.

            "Ha ha!" Duo cried out as he made Deathscythe wave its beam scythe, "Surrender now or be destroyed!"

            Trowa pointed Heavy Arms' double gattling guns at Deathscythe Hell and said, "Boom. You died."

            "Nu uhhhh!" Duo protested, "You can't shoot me when I'm in the middle of speaking!"

            Suddenly they watched Wufei's Altron figure 'whack' Heavy Arms in the back with its beam trident.

            "Oh no!" Quatre exclaimed, "Hold on, Trowa! I'm coming!" He straightened Sandrock's heat shotels before ducking under the table.

            Duo groaned, "Oh no…not…not the—"

            Quatre heaved onto the table a big plastic box filled with brown mobile suit figures, "Don't worry, Trowa! I brought back up!"

            The other three sweat-dropped as Quatre began figuring out which gun went to which figure.

            "Uh…you need any help?" Duo asked as he watched Quatre rummage through the plastic bag containing the figures' accessories.

            Quatre smiled sheepishly, "Um, yeah, if you guys don't mind…"

            The three sweat-dropped as they each picked up a Maguanac figure and began searching for the proper parts.

            Several minutes later, they were half way through.

            "Bah! It shouldn't take this long just to set up forty action figures!" Wufei complained as he tried to fit a heat ax onto Maguanac #23, "NYGH! This @#$% thing won't hold the ax!"

            "No!" Quatre cried as he took the figure away from Wufei, "This one's supposed to go on that suit!" He fitted the ax Wufei had onto Maguanac #37. 

            Wufei sweat-dropped, "What time is it?"

            Suddenly Catherine shouted, "Boys! Lunch time!"

            Wufei's eyes widened in rage, "INJUSTICE! I HAVE SPENT THE WHOLE MORNING ASSEMBLING ACTION FIGURES??!"

            "Yep," Duo said with a sigh and a shrug, "Let's go." He put down Maguanac #17 and walked to the dining room. The other guys followed.

            "So, what did you four do all morning?" Dorothy asked sweetly as they walked in.

            Quatre blushed, "Um, we played with…um…um…action figures…."

            Dorothy giggled in amusement, "Action figures? The Gundam pilots playing with action figures??? Oh, that so cute! Eeee!" She squealed.

            Quatre winced.

            "Hey, they were Deluxe Action Figures!" Duo added. After a brief pause, he added, "At least, four of them were. The rest were all Maguanac suits…"

            "Maguanac figures???" Dorothy exclaimed in amazement, "I didn't know they made Maguanac figures!"

            "Neither did I," Wufei muttered as he walked to the kitchen. 

            "Hey, Wufei," Sally said as she stirred a pot of soup, "Hand me some salt, will ya?"

            Wufei obediently walked to the cabinet grabbed some salt and gave it to Sally. He stood next to her, watching her add the salt.

            After adding the salt into the soup, Sally suddenly noticed Wufei next to her. Not knowing exactly what to do, she simply patted him on the head and said, "Good boy! Now, put this back where you found it!"

            Wufei glared at her, "Are you implying I'm your pet or something???"

            Sally ignored him and continued stirring the soup.

            "Well???" Wufei said impatiently.

            Sally turned back to him and glared, "Just put the salt back!"

            "Yes… mother…"Wufei muttered as he walked back to the cabinet.

            "Sheesh!" Sally suddenly said, "You can't even take a joke! How pathetic!"

            Wufei sweat-dropped as he slowly walked out of the kitchen. 

            "Heero! Have some soup!" Relena said as she sat a bowl down in front of him.

            Heero stared at the bowl before replying, "Thanks…"

            "Zechs," Noin whispered as she stirred her soup.

            Milliardo looked over at her, "Yeah?"

            "Did you hide it yet?" Noin asked.

            Milliardo blinked, "Hide what? Oh…that…actually, I couldn't find it."

            Noin's eyes widened, "What? You couldn't find it???"

            Milliardo nodded and sipped his soup, "They must have taken it." 

            Noin sweat-dropped, "Oh Zechs…"

            After lunch, Duo, Quatre, Wufei, and Trowa went back to assembling Quatre's Maguanac figures. 

            Heero walked by them and paused to watch, "So Quatre's got you guys working for him?"

            "Nope," Duo said as he fitted a beam rifle onto Maguanac #31, "We're just getting ready for our little war!"

            "Hm…" Wufei suddenly said as he stopped to rub his chin thoughtfully, "If he employed us to put together action figures, then…"

            "We should have gotten paid," Trowa said as he finished assembling Maguanac #27.

            "INJUSTICE!!!" Wufei roared with rage, "I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I WAS TALKED INTO ASSEMBLING TOYS WITHOUT PAY!!!"

            "Hey man, ever heard of volunteer work?" Duo said as he grabbed another Maguanac figure.

            "Why don't you help us, Heero?" Quatre suggested.

            Heero took one look at the other pilots, then looked at the box. There was only one figure left, "Roger that." He sat down and began assembling the last Maguanac. 

            "Ok!" Quatre said as he stood up, "We're done! Time to move them to the floor!"

The other pilots sighed as they each picked up some figures and placed them on the floor.

            Soon, they were ready to play. 

            "I call first strike," Duo said as he put the beam scythe in Deathscythe Hell's hands.

            ""I say we should all gang up on Duo," Wufei declared.

            "Heero, why don't you come play with us?" Quatre offered.

            Heero took one look at Quatre, then at the figures. He nodded, "Mission accepted." He ran off to get his Wing Zero action figure. 

            "So, who gets the Maguanacs?" Duo asked.

            "It wouldn't be fair if Quatre and Trowa teamed up again," Wufei stated, "I say we should make them be the targets."

            "No!" Quatre exclaimed in shock, "Of course not!"

            Duo looked at Quatre, "Then what do you suppose we should use as our targets? Christmas ornaments???"

            Quatre was discouraged, "Oh…uh…why couldn't we just pretend we're shooting at um, Invisible enemies?"  
            Wufei crossed his arms, "Hmph, fighting an invisible enemy is very difficult."

            "Exactly!" Quatre exclaimed, "And that is why we should all team up!"

           By then, Heero had returned with his figure, "So, we're attacking the Maguanacs?"

            "No, Heero!" Quatre cried, "Leave them alone! They are not the enemy!!!"

            Heero stared at Quatre, "Then who is my enemy?"

            Duo and Wufei pointed at each other.

            Quatre sweat-dropped, "You guys, why couldn't we just pretend to fight an invisible enemy???"

            "That's not fun," Duo complained.

            "Where's my enemy?" Heero said impatiently, "I…I must destroy something!"

            "That's it! I've had it!" Wufei cried as he got up, "I'm going back to play Simon!"

            Trowa and Duo looked at each other, shrugged and followed Wufei, leaving Quatre with Heero.

            "Wait, you guys!" Quatre called after them, "You have to help me put my toys back!" 

            Heero started to head out the room, "You go put your figures back. I'll go and defeat Simon."

            Quatre sweat-dropped as he began to disassemble his 40 Maguanacs.  

            Thirty minutes later, Quatre found the other pilots huddled around the coffee table in the library, pressing buttons. There was a loud buzz.

            "WAAGGH!" Wufei roared, "This is truly unjust! We have been defeated for the—"

            "97th time," Trowa said as-a-matter-of-factly, "in just three days." 

            Wufei nodded, "Yes, and this is all very, very frustrating!"

            Duo sat down on the couch, "Man, what's up with this thing? We all pressed our assigned buttons and we still lose!"

            "Maybe you guys have been going about it the wrong way!" Quatre suggested.

            "How's that?" Heero responded.

            Quatre shrugged, "I don't know."

            Suddenly Noin burst into the room, "That's it! You guys go find something else to do!" She grabbed the Simon game and stalked off.

            "What was that for?" Quatre wondered.

            "Maybe she's blaming Zechs for all of this." Heero suggested.

            "Let's go see what happens!" Duo said as he ran out the door. The other guys couldn't think of anything else to do so they decided to follow Duo.

            They saw Noin hand the game to Milliardo, who was trying to read a book while the ladies were chatting.

            "Now, put it where they won't find it!" Noin instructed.

            Milliardo sighed and took the game, "Yes, dear." He walked off to his room. He passed by the pilots on his way upstairs, "Thanks a lot, guys," he growled, "now I can't play this game until next year."

            "Cheer up!" Quatre said, "Next year's only two days away!"

            Milliardo paused, Oh…oh yeah, that's right…hm…" He continued walking upstairs.

            "Should we follow him?" Duo whispered.

            Quatre shook his head, "No, we've caused him enough trouble already."

            They spent the rest of the day trying to play blackjack. 

            "INJUSTICE!" Wufei shouted as he stood up and pointed at Heero, "YOU CHEATED!"

            Duo tossed his cards back into the pile, "C'mon, Wufei! Just how do you cheat in blackjack?"

            "He rigged the deck!" Wufei accused.

            Everyone else looked at Heero, who just stared back.

            "Hey! You're not supposed to have another deck!" Quatre cried when he noticed a second deck in Heero's lap.

            "Hm? This? It's….a bomb." Heero said calmly.

            "He didn't rig the deck," Trowa said, "He just used another one. When he got some unfavorable cards, he simply switched them with the ones from his deck."

            "Ohhh…cheater!" Duo cried.

            "You cheated too, Duo," Heero replied.

            "What??? I did not!" Duo stood up and put his hands on his hips, "Just what could possibly make you accuse me of cheating?" An ace fell out of his sleave, "Uh…besides my invisible ace you all didn't see!"

            "HA! Duo's a cheater too!" Wufei sneered.

            Trowa shrugged, "I cheated too." He lay down his hand of a queen of hearts and an ace.

            "Bah! I admit it!" Wufei said reluctantly, "I cheated too!" He threw down his hand of a king of spades and an ace.

            Quatre sweat-dropped," Am I the only one that did not cheat???"

            Everyone nodded.

PART IV: NEW YEARS' EVE

"Yay," Milliardo muttered, "I get my game back tomorrow." He got out of bed and grabbed his helmet. He sat down by the window and began polishing his helmet.

            "Zechs," Noin's voice came from under the sheets, "close the shades!"

            Milliardo obeyed and closed the shades.

            Meanwhile, Dorothy was trying to get Quatre to shut up, "Quatre Winner! Shut up! I can't stand your rants about a silly board game!"

            "It is not a board game!" Quatre cried, "It is a sophisticated piece of equipment that was somehow converted into a form of amusement, then it was mass-produced!"

            "I'm leaving!" Dorothy huffed. 

            Quatre got out of bed and looked out the window to see the snow-covered backyard, "The only way to beat Simon is to use the Zero System…"

            Downstairs, Dorothy found almost everyone else doing something.

            "I'm hungry!" Duo whined as he walked into the kitchen.

            "Here, have some of this!" Sally handed him a steaming bowl of mush, "It's good for you!"

            Duo slowly took the bowl and stared at it, "Uh…uh…."

            "Duo! Eat it!" Hilde ordered as she continued stirring the pot.

            "Ok, ok," Duo stalked off to the table.

            "Oh yay…more mush." Trowa said as he grabbed a bowl.

            "We must defeat Simon by midnight!" Wufei declared.

            "How?" Duo asked as he poked his mush.

            "Good question." Wufei responded.

            Trowa got up and left.

            "Hey Trowa! You actually ate that stuff?" Duo asked in amazement.

            Trowa nodded and walked back to the kitchen to return his bowl.

            "Im…impossible!" Wufei stuttered, "No one's been able to finish one bowl! Not even Sally!"

            Duo's eyes widened, "Uh…uh…maybe they give Trowa that sorta stuff at the circus…"

            After breakfast, the five pilots met in the library to discuss a means of defeating Simon.

            After several hours of debate, it boiled down to one simple solution: Zero System. 

            "But, as I've said dozens of times, we don't have a Zero System!" Quatre cried in frustration.

            Wufei threw down his pen, "But that's the only way we can beat it!"

            Milliardo walked in the room, "Hey kids, it's lunch time."

            "Oh yay! Lunch time!" Duo and Quatre cried in little kiddie voices as they ran out the room.

            Milliardo sweat-dropped, "Uh…was that normal?"

            "Why? Did it scare you?" Wufei asked suspiciously.

            Milliardo nodded solemly.

            Heero smirked deviously. He took a deep breath, "Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! I want lunch too!" Heero cried in a vain attempt at a kiddy voice. He danced around Milliardo singing, "Lunch, lunch, lunch! I want lunch!" 

            Milliardo became paler and paler when Wufei joined Heero. Finally Milliardo ran out the room screaming.

            "Don't tell anybody." Heero commanded, "Or I'll kill you."

             "I won't tell, if you won't." Wufei said. The two shook on it. 

            Trowa, who sat in a chair throughout the whole mess, stood up, shrugged and followed them out.

            "Hey Duo," Quatre whispered, "Just why did we do that?"

            Duo shrugged, "I guess it helps to relieve stress." 

            Milliardo ran into the room and hugged Noin, "You won't believe what I just saw!"

            Noin sweat-dropped, "Um, what is it?"

            "Those…those…kids, they were…" he panted, "they were dancing around me singing some weird song!"

            Duo and Quatre sunk in their seats.

            Noin sighed as she patted his cheek, "There, there, Zechs, it was probably just Duo."

            "No!!!" Milliardo shook his head, "You don't understand! The kids—er…Heero…and Wufei! They were doing it too!"

            Duo and Quatre's eyes widened.

            "What did you say about Heero?" Relena demanded.

            Milliardo ran over to her and began shaking her, "Look, little sister, you have no idea what that guy is up to!"

            "What do you mean???" Relena demanded, "Are you saying mean things about Heero? If you are, I'm warning you not to ever to so again! Humph!" She turned around and stalked back into the kitchen.

            "Noin! You've gotta believe me!" Milliardo cried desperately.

            Noin sighed, "Zechs, I think you've been drinking again. Why don't you go take a nap, ok?"

            "But I'm telling the truth!" Milliardo insisted.

            Just then, Heero, Trowa, and Wufei walked in.

            "Hey Zechs, you feeling ok?" Heero asked in his usual monotone voice.

            "You don't look too well," Wufei added.

            "Why don't you go take a nap?" Trowa suggested.

            Milliardo glared at the three of them before stalking off to the garage…

            After a rather peaceful lunch, the pilots continued to debate on how they could go about beating Simon. One of suggestions that were made was that they try to build their own Zero System. Obviously, that got dismissed quickly. Unfortunately, by the time dinner came around they couldn't think of anything else. They got ready for the last formal dinner of the year and assembled in the dining hall.

            "Ladies and gentlemen," Relena began as soon as they were seated, "it has been another wonderful year! I would like to propose a toast to the new year!"

            "Cheers." Duo muttered glumly as they all raised their glasses, bottles, etc.

            "Zechs! Don't drink all of your wine in one gulp! It's bad for you!" Noin whispered.

            Milliardo grunted poured himself another drink and downed that as well.

            After the lavish dinner, there was yet another dance. 

            "So, what were you boys up to today?" Catherine asked Quatre as they waltzed.

            Quatre blushed, "Um, we were uh…thinking of ways to beat…Simon."

            "Heero," Relena whispered in his ear, "don't let anything Milliardo say bother you, ok?"

            "Yeah," Heero replied. Four hours until midnight.

**PART V: NO!!! IT'S A GUNDAM!!!**

****

One hour remained until the new year arrived and they still haven't found a way to beat Simon until…

            Milliardo staggered up to Heero with a silly grin on his face. In his right hand was a bottle of wine, "Hey kid! Follow me! I got something that'll make your day! Hee hee!" Milliardo led them down to Relena's oversized garage and gestured at one of the walls, "Behold!"

            Duo sweat-dropped, "Eh, it's a…wall."

            "A nicely painted wall," Quatre added.

            Milliardo giggled childishly as he pressed a secret button. To the five pilots' amazement, the wall slid open, revealing a secret chamber. Milliardo pressed another button and a floodlight inside the chamber turned on, revealing a fully restored Gundam **Epyon**. The pilots' jaws dropped before dropping to their knees and worshipping it. 

            "Holy crap! It's real! It's actually real!" Wufei cried. 

            Suddenly the five guys stopped worshipping and ran up to the cockpit, "ZERO SYSTEM!!!" they all shrieked as they opened the hatch. Unfortunately, Quatre was shoved in. He landed on the white helmet and put it on. The pilots were too busy to notice that Epyon's eyes suddenly flashed. 

            "Quick! Get Simon!" Heero ordered.

            Milliardo handed Quatre the Simon game before staggering off to a corner to continue drinking.

            Quatre started the Simon game and quickly got passed the first several rounds. Then, about the tenth round, Zero System activated. As usual, the cockpit was filled the same yellow glow and Quatre expected to see some sort of weird vision. The little beeps from the Zero System got faster and so did the Simon game. Soon he was gasping for breath as he hands flew across the game, trying to match Simon's actions. As he continued playing, he began asking the Epyon, "How…how can I…defeat Simon?" Suddenly a white light blinded him and Quatre couldn't believe what he was seeing. He was staring through the cockpit of what appeared to be a Gundam. The pilot of the Gundam had some sort of brown Afro and was wearing a blue jacket. The most shocking part was when the pilot suddenly cried out, "You won't get away, Char!" in Quatre's voice! Then the whole scene flashed to one with the same guy, still in the Gundam and a pretty girl's face appeared on the screen, "Amuro! The Red Comet is here!" 

Suddenly, another white light blinded Quatre. When the light faded, he found himself staring at some guy that resembles Zechs, only with a totally different outfit and a more elaborate helmet. The all went dark.

            Everyone jumped out of the way as Quatre fell out of the cockpit. When they removed the helmet, they saw that he was swirly eyed and his mouth was hanging open. They decided to prop him against the wall while Heero would start over. In no time, his hands were flying all over Simon, pressing one button after another. Eventually, the game got too fast for them to keep up with. Suddenly, just right after Heero pressed the yellow button, the whole game shut off. Everyone gasped as they stared at the seemingly dead game. 

            "It's…it's…" Wufei started to say before Relena burst in.

            "Heero! Oh Heero!!! It's almost—BWAAGH! WHAT…WHAT'S THAT DOING IN HERE???" Relena screamed as she pointed at Epyon.

            "It's a Gundam, dumbass!" Milliardo called from a corner. He was obviously drunk.

            Relena gasped and fainted for two reasons: 1. Milliardo called her a dumbass. 2. a Gundam was in her garage. 

            "SIMON IS DEFEATED!!!" Everyone, including Trowa (sort of) shouted. The danced around happily. A near by clock sounded, announcing it was midnight. Everyone stopped dancing around. 

            Relena finally got over her shock, "I'm going to bed." She grabbed Heero on her way out.

            The other pilots looked at each other before shrugging and walking off to bed. Milliardo decided to spend the night in Epyon. Milliardo got the bright idea of putting on the helmet as he slept. He thought it might keep his ears warm or something.

PART VI: THE AFTERMATH 

            "You again??? What do you want???" Milliardo shouted at the figure standing outside of the open cockpit.

            The man crossed his arms, "I want you to get out of my mobile suit!" He stepped forward.

            Milliardo's eyes bulged, "TREIZE???"

            The man looked confused, "What the hell is Treize?"

            Milliardo narrowed his eyes, "Hey wait…you're that…imposter!" He lunged out at Char. The two guys began beating each other up. Suddenly Milliardo was transported to another place. He was sitting in a mobile suit cockpit. A guy with some sort of afro appeared on the screen, "Char, I demand that you surrender!" Milliardo jumped at the sound of that person's voice.

            "Uh, aren't you that uh…kid, what's his name? Uh…Quatre?" Milliardo said.

            "Hey Char, you look different…" Amuro said. Milliardo was transported to another dimension. This time he was in Epyon's cockpit. A few yards in front of him was a dangerous looking red mobile suit with a large shield and shot rifle. 

            Char's face appeared on the screen, "Now we shall battle for supremacy and honor! Hail Zeon!" 

            "What? Gimme back my helmet!" Milliardo shouted as they flew at each other. There was a flash and Milliardo woke up in his own bed. He saw Noin sitting next to him, looking very upset.

            "Zechs! How many times must I tell you not to drink and use the Zero System???" Noin scolded.

            Milliardo sat up and rubbed his head, "So Char is gone. Again…" 

            "Who's Char?" Noin questioned, "One of those imaginary people you thought you saw?"

            Milliardo sighed and lay back down, "Oh well. At least he wasn't like that guy who looked so much like me. I think his name was Vicious. Reminds me of Wufei…" he dozed off.

            "It's too bad that you all have to leave again," Relena said, as they were about to board the shuttle back to the colonies.

            "Oh well, at least we had fun!" Catherine smiled.

            "Duo," Hilde nudged Duo, "don't fall asleep now!"

            Duo opened his eyes slowly, "Eh? Oh right…" He closed his eyes and leaned on Hilde, causing her to sweat-drop.

            Dorothy squeezed Quatre and whispered, "Thanks for warming me up while we bunked together! Tee hee!"

            Quatre tried not to cringe, "Uh, you're welcome, Miss Dorothy." 

            After several more minutes, they boarded the shuttle to go home.

            Relena sweat-dropped as she watched the shuttle take off. They'll be back soon…

After Colony 199: Peace has returned to the Peacecraft mansion and from that point forward, major holidays were spent at Relena's….

Author's notes: I decided to throw in Sazabi (Char's mobile suit from _Char's Counterattack)_, Amuro, and Vicious from Cowboy Bebop for fun. 

Anybody ever wonder what ever became of Epyon? If you thought it was destroyed when Zechs destroyed Libra's main reactor, then how did he make it back to Earth? Obviously Epyon must have survived, since Gundams were freakishly durable. After he got back to Earth, Zechs must have hidden it somewhere. That's just my theory.


End file.
